Sue Coletta on her blog dated 21 May, http://crimewriterblog.com pointed out the importance of a hook to captivate your readers. I already knew after the cover, the first paragraph of a book is the most important part of the story. You want your reader to be engaged from the first sentence. After reading what Sue had to say, I played around with the sequence of my chapters and jumped right into the midpoint. I also ditched the prologue and made it a chapter.
Tell me what you think about Chapter One of my latest novel. Asylum. Are you engaged? Do you want to read on? I would love to have your feedback.
Fin Calloway woke drenched in sweat. It had been three hours since the police had left. They had asked if they could call someone to be with her; but there was nobody. There had only ever been Robbie and now he was dead.
She rolled out of bed, looked down at her leg and noticed the gash on her leg; swollen and sore. Strange. She hadn’t felt the pain, until now. On her way to the bathroom she tripped over a pile of wet clothing lying on the bedroom floor, noticed the muddy footprints on the carpet. She had no memory of when or how she had got home last night. This was happening to her a lot lately; missing gaps in her life which she could not explain.
In the bathroom she clung to the sink with one hand while she leant over and spat the bile from her mouth. She splashed cold water onto her face and knew she should have a shower, but she needed a coffee first. She stumbled into the kitchen and gazed out of the window at the quiet street outside her apartment. Sydney was waking up to a wet and gloomy day. She grabbed the last of the cigarettes from the kitchen bench, noticed not for the first time the health warning and the gross photo of a cancerous lung on the pack. Instead of lighting up she switched on the kettle, picked up a mug from the sink and waited for the water to boil. ‘What is happening to me?’ She tried to piece together what she could remember of the dream, when part of it came back to her: she had been trying to get away from someone, or something.